Reason #6

Today I sliced up a loaf of banana bread and placed it on a plate in anticipation of my kids coming home from school and wanting a snack. I set it in the middle of the kitchen table, and then I sat down at the computer to check facebook. I heard a funny noise coming from the from the kitchen, but didn't think much of it, because in my mind there was no way that my medium size dog could possibly reach the plate up there on the middle of the table. Well, apparently, I was wrong.

My Sister's Dog

Today I hate my sister's dog....

My sister and I and our families and our dogs have been staying at my parent's house. Today I was walking barefoot through the dining room on my way to do some laundry when I stepped in something warm and wet. My sister's dog had thrown up.... 4 tampons.

Reason #5

My dog licks herself very, very loudly and she always does it at bedtime. So every night we hear "Slurppy, Slurppy, slurppy, slurrppy, slurrrrrrrrrrrrp, slurrppy." Gross.

Reason #4

I was at my parents house enjoying the afternoon and decided to check my messages one day. There was one from the Humane Society. They said that some lady named Nora had my dog. Her dog was barking at something so she opened her door to see what was making her dog go crazy. It was my dog. Then my dog slipped past the lady, ran into this her house, went into her bathroom and wouldn't come out. I had to track down the lady's house and remove my stupid dog from her bathroom. Very embarrassing.

Reason #3

I came home tonight to find this.....

...seriously dog, you are making this too easy.

Reason #2

She will wait until you go to bed to decide she needs to go out. For example, I can go to bed at 10 pm and she'll whine to be let out at 10:18. So the next night I'll stay up till 11. She'll whine at 11:10. I'll stay up till 11:30... she'll whine at 11:45. So annoying!

Reason #1

She smells so freakin' bad. She farts..... a lot.